Wednesday, February 17, 2010

About that...

I know I said that blogging didn't count here as writing. And Yes, I know that ANY writing is writing, good or bad, grocery list or magnificent insight into the human condition. (Actually blogging is a little bit of both. )
The reason I said it didn't count here, is because- though it is written ( or typed) it is actually more like a conversation. A conversation usually with and about and to- myself ( go figgure!) And a conversation with you all. So the communication form isn't verbal and oral- it is written- so I don't count it as writing.
Writing, in the sense that I mean it here, is to create a story. A beginning a middle and an end. To connect cosmic dots in a way that other will 'get it' the same way I do.
I am struggling to tell a story- many stories actually- to enlighten, to entertain- to make someone stop and go- "OHHH!" And to entertain myself. I want to write a story that I want to read.
And though my story is nearly done- sometimes when I read the middle (those awful middles!) I go- " Eh- So what? Who will want to go on reading from here?"

I know how to 'do it'. I know how to fix it. I just can't seem to muster the creative energy right now to attempt it!
Could it be the weather? Menopause? Over work? Apathy? Maybe all of it.
Have I felt this before?
Ask my friends in my writing groups ( or former groups ). I guess I do this every year about this time, so maybe it is seasonal. Whatever it is, it feels permanent this time. And it frightens me that I may not get it back, or even want to.
So like any good woman, (cough.. ahemm..**) I try to talk it out, by blogging to you all. To rev my creative blood, to hear your feedback, your encouragement and your stellar ideas.
I am hoping it comes back.
Soon.

8 comments:

Laughing Orca Ranch said...

I hear ya. Writing is tough, especially writing a storythat you think others may be able to relate to the same way that you experienced it.

And then there are many times that I feel some kind of pressure instilled from years in public school beint told the right and correct way to write. That's when I get writer's block, because I feel way too much pressure to get it right. bleh!

~Lisa

Carolyn Plath said...

What I know about you is that you are a very funny and creative person. You have LOTS of funny stories, full-blown, in your head.

You are a writer. If that could somehow leave you, you wouldn't be worrying about it. You'd let it go. But you won't, because you can't not be a writer.

Vaquerogirl said...

Lisa- I do sometimes here that third grade teacher " Write what you know" "Tell em what you are going to tell em.." "You are a lousy speller"
Well, she never actually SAID that one...
But I feel ya!
Carolyn- Thank you! I think you are a riot too! And yes, my head is crammed with stories- but does any one want to hear them?
And I can't let it go- can I...

Vaquerogirl said...

oohh and YES I know that I used 'here' WRONG in that first sentence- what a goober!

Maia said...

Ok. Here we go. Since the book is done, walk away until the 1st of March. DO NOT EDIT OR WRITE ANYTHING. Then on March 1st read the whole thing one more time, making notes on what you feel needs to be changed. Starting March 2nd, spend two hours a day working on it. Force yourself to do it.

I have a question, are you over edited? Is it time to give it a kiss and send it off? As my neice used to tell me when I refused to look at some outfit she'd picked out, "You never know unless you try."

PS:
I will be commenting on March 1st to see if you did it.

Nuzzling Muzzles said...

I know the frustration of wanting to write on a creative level and not being able to for one reason or another. There was a time where I had the luxury to do nothing but raise my children and be a freelance writer. However, day after day I found myself writing letters to friends instead of working on a poem or short story or novel. I suspect that if I knew I was going to have to work overtime for the rest of my life in the software industry, I would have used that time more wisely.

Maia said...

It's me again. I don't know where you are in the process. Here's where I was when the bottom fell out. I had an agent. I had the beginnings of a contract with a publisher. My agent wanted to see some changes. I also belonged to a list of published authors, my agent got me on that list, because my soon to be editor was on it. I thought I was emailing my changes to my agent, turned out I emailed my changes to the list. I lost my agent, I lost my contract and it took me ten years for me to write anything again.

So here we go. If you send your manuscript out and it is rejected. You will not be told that you are an incomptetant idiot,who couldn't write her way out of a box, and don't ever bother them again. You will be told that your work doesn't meet their current needs, but please send them something else. If you get 20 of those letters put your work away and start something new.

I will tell you this much, believable dialog is key as is believable emotion. You must grab your reader within the first three paragraphs. I used to remember, "Scarlett O'Hara wasn't beautiful" whenever I wrote anything. If your beginning is good enough, your characters grab the reader, and your ending wraps it all up, they will help you with the middle.

PS: I have trouble spelling cat,so don't think you are alone.

Pony Girl said...

Interesting post and comments. My dream is to be a writers someday. I have started many, many books, but have never finished them. Just can't find the time between a full-time job, my horse, blogging, etc. I guess I can make the effort if I really wanted to. I certainly won't have more time once I add a husband and kids to the mix, will I, LOL?
Best of luck, you have talent, so hang in there! It's a tough world, that publishing world.